Rob’s new descriptive phrase and definition – ‘Lawn Twat’ – anyone unhealthily obsessed with the condition of their lawn to the point of being obnoxious while overlooking any other potentially detrimental landscaping details such as loose slates, overgrown bushes, and poor lighting.

That is his new name for our landlord. Seriously. The man dragged Rose’s tent into the woods because she set it up to dry on the lawn for two hours. The new grass might apparently die in that time. What is one to think? I also got yelled at for screwing with the water system, something I was not at fault for. The result? He left and the handle was turned tightly off, something our neighbor had apparently done and he had not noticed. I was not sure if this was normal, so I called him. And texted him. Four hours later he texted back. “Make it work for your needs. Then set it back for the lawn near the porch door.” How does that answer the original text of “Went to get water for plants. Main faucet was off. Do you want it/does it need to stay off?” Answer: it doesn’t.

Is it just me, or is he the stupidest smart guy I know?

This is just the latest in a long list of stupid things. I’ll update another time.