This is a blog post from Facebook that I had to share
Deborah Hanscom Jarvis Did some of the not-so-fun legal stuff with my mother today and later got into a conversation about what sorts of things she would need to put on a list. One of the things was that she didn’t want any stuffed animals put into the casket. At first, I thought that this was because she thought it was silly, but she explained that she didn’t want them shut away in the dark never to see the light of day again. It was a very Velveteen Rabbit moment, and I think that maybe I am the only one who understands her. I got thinking about it a few minutes ago and now I can’t stop crying. This is not helping me get to sleep tonight.
The worst part is, I am not sure why this makes me so sad.
My return posts were wonderful…
Kevin Gavel It makes perfect sense to me….
Deborah Hanscom Jarvis Which part, the stuffed animals or the crying
Karen Ellis Makes sense to me, too, and yes.
Deborah Hanscom Jarvis I think that that comment is just so mom, and then I got thinking about how lonely she is sometimes and why I call her everyday.
Kevin Gavel Both Deb, No one likes to think that their parents are mortal. And not wanting the stuffed animals to be shut away i can understand too. When I die, I want my friends to go on, not be buried with me. (Though I am thinking I’d prefer cremation)
Jean Henchey It’s a good sign. She made a decision. It’d be worse if she didn’t want to make decisions. Don’t over analyze it!!!!!!!!!
Adewyn Le Blanc That made me tear up
Theresa Live Just goes to show, that bit of wimsy, wonder, and loving kindness, is in all of us, even if we don’t show it all of the time. Hugs all around!
But the longest (and private) response was this—
Deb Miller I was gonna post this out, then I thought, well, we don’t know each other well and I don’t know your mom at all, so maybe my 2 cents is better private – but I was a hospice nurse for 18 years, etc. and some of this kinda stuff is right in my comfot zone, so I’m happy to talk with you about some and then the first thing that popped in my head was this: when I was little, I used to take all of my stuffed pals off the shelf and line them all up around the bed so none would feel left out – this brought that back — I think this moment is actually a gift, when her time does come, it’s just one more bit of precious, intimate sweetness for you to celebrate her true spirit. If you are the only one that understands her – what a joy that flashes of her true self got to be seen in this life. If she is so lonely, maybe you can help her open that door somehow – through some creative way: music, expressive somethings, audio books, etc. or through some peopleey way… it doesn’t have to be all on you and she’s not gone yet! Choose your perspectives more gently because they add energy to this place and the next
Deborah Hanscom Jarvis you are certainly welcome to post this out. Thank you.
Deb Miller well, it’s meant for you – if you think someone else will benefit from it, then we can do with it what you like. my heart just went out to you when I read your post this morning precious moments are these, these are what we live for, not the soccer run and the to do list – but the moments where we are deeply truly seen.
Wow. Just Wow.
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